SPEAKING MY MIND...................

IN A DIFFERENT LIGHT..................



It's a lonely night.........spending a few minutes in the balcony looking into the beautiful harbour,the sea with the reflected light and the star studded sky......mind gets refreshed.it was an ordinary day.as usual ,an unknown friend sends the good morning greetings sincerely and i never acknowledge his kind gesture.may be,i don't want to build any more bonds. thanks a lot for taking time for me to send those beautiful lines.........


friend,i had read those offline messages but was not in a mood to reply.[you are such a good friend,but at times,i behave this way].morning when you spend time to browse through my posts,u will find the answer.u must be wondering where did i vanish?or why not in touch since days.i don't have an answer. it happens.for no reasons u feel low.getting the negative emotions under control is very difficult.the bright level of self esteem disappears.one tends to get upset.human nature is really strange.


i think,i have to put out set backs in an imaginary envelope labelled ''waste of time'' and brushing off negative people and put them under the category,''toxic''.how can i permit someone to take me for granted? hey,stop that.



this happens.this is a passing phase.when we focus on another person's story,we overcome our internal distractions.when people get the opportunity to speak and be respectafully heard,it gives them a feeling of empowerment.

during these late hours of the night,i think of the fresh jasmine,evergreen trees in the mountains,roses in the garden and my amma and my home.i'm eagerly waiting for this summer to catch the first konkan railway to reach my hometown.my stress buzzer,the only way to get my heart light and mind peaceful.

the large compound,the nagakkavu,the tall tamarind trees,the swarna malaripookal,the mangoes and jasmines.looking forward to capture and cherish the childhood memories................wanna talk to me?like the carefree child ,i spend the days with amma and she teaches me how to forgive to feel better.it's difficult,i know.but,i try.my attidute wears a new look.at guruvayoor temple,i meet my school mates.they bring back the good old days. darshan of unnikannan gives me relief and satisfaction.
we meet most of our classmates in temples].last time i was introduced to pushpam's son at varkey's.she was my close friend of 'little flower'and after many years we could talk to each other on phone.

when we cousins and friends walk down home,after the classes,the group of boys meet you regularly and when they come closer,the dark short guy,utters,''zindabad''.that was a code word for being the leader of a procession.and one enjoys the special recognition and identifies the glow in the eyes.later he reached the middle east and later settled down in the nearby village.when someone points out his huge bunglow,u can't help giving a smile.

we always carry the lighter moments of life.

good morning!have a great day ahead............[it's morning now....

and to u,
rahi baat aank mein aansuon ki...........,
kissie ke dard ko apana samjhna
har kissi ke bas ki baat nahim

the simple unforgettable teen experiences.more in the later post.
i don't want to let go all those sources of inspiration.they give me strength..


it's anu signing off.........
sasneham,
anu